Let me just start by saying that all my life, it had been the norm to believe in ghosts and have ghosts around me. My family is not particularly deeply interested in the supernatural - they have been to clairvoyants once or twice - but most have had ghostly experiences. My grandma, grand dad, auntie, mum, cousin and maybe my little sister have all seen and communicated with ghosts before, in particular my cousin who communicates with them and speaks with them regularly.
My families, excepting my cousin, have only had one or two experiences with ghosts, but recently something keeps happening to me, and it happens regularly. When I was 7 or 8 I had an out of body experience. I didn't even realize what it was until recently when I discussed it with my mum, but all I can say is that I remember it vividly and I remember floating freely and watching my house from above and feeling the cool wind before floating back through the window and looking down upon my sleeping body before waking up, and it was probably one of the most amazing experiences of my life. This is the only out of the ordinary thing that has ever happened to me before now.
Recently, I have been experiencing something strange, and it is a little scary, I must admit, so I was wondering if anybody had an explanation for it. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before, and I am 15 years old, and I have always thought that stuff like this happens from when you are very young, so it seems it's a little late for me to start now. At first it happened in the state between awake and sleep, so I guess you could say that I was half asleep. Suddenly I just felt this paralyzing sensation, as if I couldn't move at all, as if I shouldn't move. I felt a connection between someone or something and my chest, as if someone was sharing something with me through this connection.
After a few minutes it stopped, and I was so scared I couldn't move for a little bit afterwards out of pure fear, but eventually I managed to grab my pillows and get to my mum's bed. But in those few seconds where I couldn't move, I think I sensed someone in the room with me, and one particular spot in my room keeps popping into my mind, so I think that spot was where they were standing when it happened. It was strange because just a few minutes earlier I was on the brink of sleep, and now I was wide awake.
When I told my cousin (the one who regularly sees spirits) the next day, he was worried, but I couldn't shake off the feeling that it wasn't bad, it was something good being shared with me. It happened a few more times, always at night. One time I felt somebody rubbing my shoulder, and the other day I was playing cricket for a long time, and when I got home I had a severe aching in that shoulder which won't go away, even when I massage it. Another time, I felt somebody patting my ankle (I was lying on my side), and when I was playing cricket that time, my ankle got hurt too, so now it is really messed up and I have to watch out when I walk. I regularly change which end of my bed I lay my head, and now where I lay my head is the end of my bed, which used to be the foot of my bed, and I started to feel someone standing in a new spot, which was right beside the bed. When I told my cousin, who is very protective of me, he took a few precautionary measures against any bad spirits who may be around and it stopped for a week or so, until last night.
I had a dream the other night, but I don't know if it is connected to what happened last night. In my dream, I walked into my kitchen which looked normal with the massive window. My mum was standing there wearing a pair of glasses which was odd, and she was just looking out the window. She gave me a pair which I put on, and as I looked out the window I saw a lot of sunshine and lots of people walking around in my garden, who hadn't been there a second before. My cousin was walking too, talking with two men, one of whom was, I think, his dad who passed away a long time ago, but I can't be sure because my dreams are always unclear. I took off the glasses and the scene disappeared, and put them back on, and the people appeared again. I asked my mum when my cousin had passed away, and she smiled sadly and told me not long ago. I woke up crying and upset because I am very close to my cousin, but my mum reassured me that he is okay.
Last night, I went to sleep as usual. Before I went to sleep, I had been crying a lot. I was just feeling very low, and so weak. I had a dream, which I won't even mention because it was so boring and pointless that I can't even remember what happened in it. In my dream, I lay down to go to sleep, on my back, when suddenly I felt a large, warm hand come down from somewhere. At first I thought it was God because it appeared to come from the sky, but then I recognized the hand; it was my cousin's hand, large, warm, and caring, protective, and it was stroking my head. I know it was a dream, but it was so real, just that part though. I hurriedly woke myself up, and as soon as I woke up I had the paralyzing sensation again. Also, I was lying on my back, just like in my dream, which was strange because I always sleep on my side, and I don't change positions in the night.
My cousin had told me to fight the sensation just in case it was something bad, so I did, but it was tough. I finally managed to run to my mum's room and jump in her bed. It was 4:05 in the morning. We discussed it for a bit, and when I told her about the hand she said to me that only one other person had hands like my cousin, and that was his dad, who has always cared for my mum, me and my brothers and sisters, and especially for my cousin. He was also very tall which could have explained the hand coming from somewhere up high. He had come to my mum in a dream a few years previously and asked her to look after my cousin. I was so overwhelmed with emotion that all I could do was cry. I felt guilty that I had cut off the connection instead of letting it fill me with strength at this low point, which it does do (I always feel invigorated afterwards), but my mum told me that if it was my cousin's dad, he would understand.
Does anybody have anything to say about this? I have all the usual teenager problems; friends, homework, exams, but this is a different problem, and it is confusing. Can anyone offer an explanation? Just to add, I live in England and the experiences I have had have all happened in the house where I live now, apart from the OBE which happened in my old house.
Thank you.