My Sir Rudolph

When I turned 12, I was very depressed about everything. So many deaths had occurred, and so many insults had been thrown at me. I wanted to die.

As the seasons shifted from summer to winter, my depression shifted to being slightly sad, to locking myself in my room, never talking to anyone. Literally. But then he came along.

I was minding my own business when my books were thrown off the table. I jumped up quickly and moved away. After a moment I slowly began picking everything back up. After that, I put my things away and for the rest of the week I didn't set anything down on the table.

The next week, I had arrived home from school and sat down. Taking my shoes off and turned on the TV. I was watching my program when the TV started fuzzing (the only way it can is if you press a button on the set. I wasn't near it). I was sorta irritated, and jumped up. I started to fix the TV when I got really chilly. There was a boy. He looked creepy in a way, he had black hair, and pale skin. He had a long scar running down his arm. I stared at him then asked him his name. He told me it was Rudolph.

After that day I began to hate myself even more, thinking I was a freak of nature because no one would believe me. I thought he was evil! Until one night I freaked out and tried hurting myself. He didn't know I did things like this. When he came into the bathroom, because he knew something was wrong, he was so mad. I was bleeding a lot and crying. He called me stupid and made me get rid of the razor I had used. He began to help me bandage my arm and had told me how he had killed himself. And that mark on his arm was from it. It was a scar.

I felt horrible, I had taken everything for granted when nothing was wrong with my life. He made me notice it. He made me realize how DUMB I was acting and how precious I was to him, my family, and my friends. He told me I was beautiful but stupid. And I agreed.

I didn't trust him or anyone before all this. But then, once I realized how he had literally saved me, I was overwhelmed with feelings. I couldn't believe HE, someone so, well. Not your typical Guardian angel, WOULD HELP ME. Why? Why would he do this?

He told me he missed being alive. I should take my life seriously. The way I was acting was stupid.

After that day, I had gained my life back. I began to eat more. Talk more. Even smile more! He made me so happy. He saved me. If it weren't for Rudolph, I probably wouldn't be here right now, enjoying my life to the fullest.

I don't know where he is today, but all I can say is, he means so much to me... Never judge a book by it's cover.