This is something that I have been dealing with as long as I can remember, and it feels like for some reason these darker things are coming back into my life. I don't know whether they are following me or have always been attached to me. Either way, I know they are no figment of my imagination and I hardly ever share this story so the attention-seeking thing is not in the intent either. Maybe you could offer me some advice after you read my story?
I guess it mainly started when I moved into the house I grew up in, which was in a rural area in Utah called Spanish Fork. We moved there when I was about three and, yes, I actually do remember it. God has blessed me with a very long term memory.
It's a pretty decent-sized house: four bedrooms, two bathrooms, two floors on a about 1 1/2 acre property. The first thing I remember is that I would hear people talking, like having a conversation. Back then I thought it was my mommy and daddy just being loud, and I would go look and want to play with them too, but they would be dead asleep. I thought that they were telling secrets, so I would get mad when I got back in bed. I would hear it again and get even more mad cause I felt ignored, but mom and dad were still fast asleep when I went to go check. My little brother is three years younger than me, so I knew that the only people who could be talking were my parents, or so I thought.
The night it started going bad was one of the scariest moments of my life. I am the oldest in my family and am very protective over my siblings. I would literally take a bullet for them, every time. This particular night was the first time I saw 'them' or 'it'. I woke up to someone opening my door and I instantly knew it wasn't my parents.
When the dark mass/figure came into the room I felt danger, and knew its intent wasn't good. It went straight to my brothers crib and I know I should have screamed for help, at that age its very natural to do. But I didn't, I'm not sure why, but I actually got off my bed and in some form of a four year old's language I said, "Don't hurt him, hurt me." And that's all I can remember of that night.
Looking back now, I think it makes sense on why these things mainly focused on me. As a toddler, I didn't know I was inviting something in. I just knew that it is my job to keep my baby brother safe.
After that things intensified. Almost every night I was visited by some sort of figure, sometimes many. They would walk around my room, try to pull me out of bed, growl, hiss, say my name, scratch and throw me against the wall. After a few blessings from my father I learned that if I prayed, they could not touch me in bed. It was almost like my bed was a 'safety zone'. Other times I would grab my doll (another thing that oddly I felt protected by) and if it got too intense and I wanted to go sleep in my parents' room they would come swarm around my bed and block my path. Almost every night I would try to scream or flee to my parents' room and sleep on the floor next to my dad. And when I did make it out of bed they, of course, would follow me, or many times even stop me by pushing me down or making the door impossible to move so it wouldn't open. I, then, would try to run back in my bed or call for help.
They were very smart and would try to trick me from getting out of my 'safety zone'. They would appear as children saying, "Come play with us, Christina" or, the scariest thing to me, as my parents. One particular instance I remember of this is when I woke up to see my dad in my room holding out his hand, but he wasn't looking at me. He was looking straight ahead, but his hand was out towards me. I got out of bed, and when I went to touch him I stopped because instantly the thought popped in my head, "No, Christina, don't!" and I was frozen in fear and the imposter starting smiling and the best way I can describe it, began to melt into something big and black. I instantly got back into bed. Honestly, after that, when the sun would go down I was a little scared of my amazingly loving parents cause I didn't know if it was truly them or not.
I think the 'thing' that was the strongest was the man. I only call him a man cause of his voice, which was deep. He spoke a lot and hid in the shadows. He would tell me to do things to hurt my family or myself. When this happened I would pray, which made him angry and growl loud. I only saw what I think was his true form once.
My cousins were over and we were playing hide and seek. Being the oldest I, of course, was the best hider. We had a river behind our house that passed under a bridge under the main road. Under the bridge was a favorite hangout and hiding spot of mine so I decided to
Go and hide there. When I got to the bridge I started to hear the man's voice. This really scared me because I, in my head (I was 8 or 9 at the time), thought that these things could only talk to me at night. I felt them during the day, of course, but the light of the day made it feel safer I think. I heard him talking behind me and he
Said, "Jump!" which I knew to be jump off the bridge. In my head I could see myself jumping and laughing as I fell into the water. I knew though that the bridge was high and the current of the river was very bad that year, so bad that my parents forbade us to wade in it. I out loud said, "No, I don't want to." In reply I heard, "Do it, it's fun, do it now, DO IT!" The last "DO IT" was screamed at me from behind and I turned around. I saw, to my horror, the thing that had tormented me for years night on end. He looked, as best as I can describe, it like a warthog. I could not see his body because he was wearing a light brown cloak, but he had a staff in one of his claw-looking hands. His eyes were something that stuck out the most. One was this electric looking yellow with almost a reddish tinge, the other, a light bright with the bottom half a dark green.
He began to move towards me saying, "Jump now, b*tch!" I was so terrified that I got up on the the bridge and heard him cackle behind me. The next thing I know I hear a siren coming down the road. It was a cop. I turned around and the thing was gone. The cop stopped and told me I was going to hurt myself if I played on the bridge like that and that I should probably go home. I know if it wasn't for the officer I wouldn't be writing this.
Throughout all my experiences my family didn't really have so much on the paranormal side. But I know that certain members of my family felt them. For a long time my mom was in a deep deep depression and her mood was extremely unreliable. My sister would have bouts of rage over absolutely nothing, rage that a child should not have.
My mom and dad, however, are very religious and straightforward in their thinking. I would tell them what I would see and hear and, at first, I think they thought it was just my imagination. But when darker things came into play and I told my mom that sometimes I didn't know if it was them or not, she put me in a psych ward at the age of 14. I don't blame them. They had a child that at such a young age began to harm themselves and want to not live. I would want help for my kid as well.
My mom although says that when she went to clean my room while I was at the hospital she felt a 'darkness' and thought maybe I wasn't as crazy as she thought. We have talked about it since then and I feel more validated.
When I got back from the hospital with a diagnosis of depression I hoped that things were done. They weren't, but I did not want to go back in the hospital so I didn't tell anyone. I kept it to myself. Although many nights, even at the ages of fifteen, sixteen and seventeen, I would go and sleep in my parents room because the things got too intense again.
Finally, before my senior year of high school, my parents decided to move. You would think that I would be happy about leaving that terrible place. Oddly I was not. I was so incredibly angry and hateful towards them when they told me. The week of packing I felt
Like I had no energy. I seriously sat in my closet in my room while people packed. I would have dreams of burning down our orchard, or hurting one of my family members so bad that we wouldn't have to move.
Finally when we did move, slowly I began to get out of that funk. Especially when no nightly visitors came. I never felt anything, nothing bad, no negativity. Just happy environment and love for my family.
I look back and don't know why my old house was so intense or why it happened to me, but to this day I still have experiences. I've been told I'm a 'sensitive' or a medium'. I think that I don't open myself up because I'm a little scared of what I will see or sense. I know that 95% of the time these entities are human but I think because I had this experience, its almost like I'm 'marked'. That's how I feel anyways.
About a month ago I got in touch with an old friend who is into the paranormal and is an investigator. She is one of the few that have heard my story, and we decided to go investigate. I don't know why I've felt the need to do so, maybe for validation or maybe to put it behind me. We did not go into the house because it is occupied. But we did go in the backyard.
After many personal and some documented experiences that night she told me, "How the hell did you survive here?" I would tell you what happened but this is beginning to become a novel.
Ever since that night, things have been trying to creep back in, and I know it's from my old house. I am not one to be scared, I've been through a lot so it made me tough, but I am concerned that they are trying to come back. One person even told me I have a demon attached to me, I don't know if that's true or not. But if it is, I don't know where to turn. Telling people got me in the psych ward before, and now especially since I'm an adult of 25, imagination can't be the natural explain away.
If you have any advice or tips on what I can do that would be amazing. Thanks for reading my story. Like I said, I know it's pretty intense and some may say farfetched. But I know it happened, and I will stick my story until the day I die.
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