I have been experiencing what I call "visits" since I was 8 years old (I'll be 23 in a week). I was born in caul* so from a young age my mother has always joked that I am witch, but according to myth I supposedly have the a "deeper awareness and understanding of the world in which we live."
I don't fully remember how it all started but I remember being scared to go to sleep around 2nd grade, developing full on childhood insomnia. This led my parents to put me in counseling in hopes that it would help. Thinking back, the earliest vivid visitations started occurring around the age 11. It started out just with very tall shadowy figures watching me. Sometimes it's as many as 3 at a time, but usually just one. At this time they never came very close or touched me. There were periods of time where I would go without seeing them at all - up to two years at a time, but when I moved to college at age 18 they started coming closer. I don't know if this was because I was on my own for the first time and they felt less threatened to interact with me or what, but ever since things have gotten worse and worse.
The first physical encounter was when I was 20. I was living with my boyfriend in a little house we were renting together at the time. (A lot of strange things happened in that house. One morning my boyfriend and I woke up and there was a very large perfect circle of water -NOT SWEAT- in the center of our bed... No leaks in the roof, no logical explanation whatsoever. There were consistently loud footsteps at night, doors would shut on their own, the sink would randomly fill itself with scalding hot water... It was not a happy place.)
One morning he left before I woke up to go to an early class. I woke to say goodbye then laid in bed for a while, not really wanting to move and eventually dozed off. It's not unusual for me to have dreams where I am completely aware of my actual surroundings, where I can see everything in the room around me... But on that morning the first and one of the most terrifying encounters happened. The figure first appeared in the corner of the bedroom then slowly approached my bed. It had no real shape, but was completely black. It almost looked like a person wearing a burqa. I was too scared to move but I watched it closely. It sat down on the corner of my bed next to my foot and where it sat I felt my foot dip down with the weight of it.
This has been happening consistently, 5 times a month at least, since then and has been getting worse and worse.
About 2 months ago there were three watching me, one came to the bed where I had fallen asleep in a curled up position and pulled my leg until it was straight. It's gotten to the point where I can't sleep out of fear. I see them in my peripherals all the time when I am alone. It's awful. What do they want with me?! I'm so tired of sleepless nights or waking up in tears.
I understand that these experiences are most commonly associated with sleep paralysis, but my research tells me that only about 3% of the global population experiences this on such a regular basis and no one I've ever met and talked to has had it for so long or to the degree of intensity that I am continuously experiencing.
But last night, something even stranger happened...
I fell asleep very quickly which is incredibly odd for me. When I was slipping in to sleep, I felt a strange sensation near the back of my head that wrapped around to my cheek. It was like suddenly my head and pillow had become magnetic and were being sucked together. I woke up around 4:30am feeling like I was being watched and across my room, standing in front of my bookshelves reading a book was a boy that looked to be in his early 20's. He was so real, so incredibly real that I immediately assumed he was an intruder. I was so paralyzed with fear that I barely could work up the courage to say "hello,"
But I finally did. When I spoke his eyes moved towards me and I immediately reached for my bedside lamp and turned the light on. As soon as the lamp switched on, he was gone. But after he left a weird smell hung in the air and my body, from the pelvis down, turned cold and tingly- like a breeze was hitting my legs but I felt with my hand and they were not cold to the touch... It was like a deeper cold. The chair I had sitting next to the shelves was pushed to the side, as well.
This was so far from any other visits I've experienced. For once, it did not feel threatening though. I am thoroughly creeped out, none the less. I live in a very old apartment building in an area where a lot of college students live and I wonder if this is the ghost of a past resident that maybe died at a young age. I'm thinking of doing a bit of research to find out more about past tenants.
I was wondering if sage smudging is something worth trying? I'm curious to see if it would help with both the shadow visitors and the ghost boy.
Even now as I am researching and writing this, I keep getting waves of tingles and chills all over my body.
*Side note: Anyone else here born in the caul/behind the veil? I've never met anyone else that has and always wonder if this might have something to do with my experiences.
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