Though this incident happened with me and my husband, it had faded from my memory up until last night when it came up while discussing with my mother about the trip during which it had happened.
At the outset, I would like to mention that I share a beautiful relationship with my husband. We do have our share of disagreements and arguments like any other couple, but not at the cost of the mutual respect and love we feel for each other. Besides our daughter, he is the only person for whom I'll happily give my life away and I am sure the feeling is mutual.
So the year was December 2016 and we were off to this small beach town in Konkan region in Maharashtra state to celebrate our first wedding anniversary. This town is famous for a temple of the deity whom I worship and it is located close to the shore. So with the intention of seeking His blessings for our married life as well as enjoying the beach, we had booked a three night stay at a beach resort which was fairly close to both the temple and the beach.
Our room itself was spacious and airy with double doors leading to a sea facing balcony which brought in good amount of light and air into the room. Since we reached in the day, we were pretty pleased with the breathtaking view of the sea and our choice of the resort. After a quick lunch and nap we went for a stroll on the beach in the evening. After returning back to the room, we closed the double doors of the balcony to prevent the swarm of mosquitoes from entering into the room. As there were no lights on the beach, the view of the sea that felt so beautiful in the morning was pitch dark in the night and only the sound of the waves hitting the shore could be heard. The atmosphere in the room too had changed. Even though the lights were on, the room felt dark, gloomy and overall depressing, the closed doors and windows adding to the suffocating feeling. I felt uneasy, sad, depressed and suffocated all at once in the room.
After dinner that night I fell asleep as soon as I hit the bed, facing towards my husband, who was busy on his cell phone. I am not sure for how long I slept, but at one point I suddenly woke up. Now there was no disturbance that could have woken me up, but this is not unusual of me by any means. What was unusual though was I woke up without stirring. Still facing towards my husband, I opened my eyes and kept on staring at my him without blinking. I was aware of staring at him but somehow couldn't stop and by each passing minute I was feeling immense hatred towards him. This was not over something as trivial as he still being busy on his cell phone. It was much more raw and intense and was beyond my control. I felt no love for him at that moment and was almost on the verge of attacking him. I must have stared only for a minute or two but it felt like a couple of minutes. Before things could get out of hand, I saw my husband turn to the other side, keep his cell phone on the table, turn back towards me with a smile and ask me why I woke up. This broke the spell and brought me back to reality. I shook my head in answer, turned to the other side and slept again.
The next day, I forgot about this incident until my husband mentioned it. According to him, while he was busy on his cell phone, he suddenly sensed the tension in the room and saw me giving him the death stare from the corner of his eye. He felt that any moment then I might have removed a knife from under the covers and stabbed him. So without looking at me, he kept his cell phone on the side table, gathered some courage and turned to smile and talk to me to ease the tension. He said the situation gave him the heebie jeebies and that I'd managed to scare the life out of him.
We discussed some more about it, laughed together and I apologized for scaring him. We put the incident behind us and looked forward to enjoy and celebrate our anniversary. Nothing untoward happened during the rest of our stay except me feeling uncomfortable in the room after sundown.
As I look back upon it, I can still remember the hatred I felt towards my husband that night. I am still confused and clueless as to what it actually was. That is the purpose of posting this experience on this forum and any ideas or suggestions regarding it will be appreciated.
Although it was one of the best trips of my life and the resort was unexceptionally beautiful, the mere memory of that room and this incident is enough to refrain me from going back to that place.
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