I Don't Believe, He Does

I am playing gradual catch-up here on the site as the summer has been a bit hectic. I can but second the advice already given - go for the cleansing, honor your brother's memory the way *you* (and you alone) see fit (he was *your* brother and it is your feelings about him that are the most important here, not H's), keep your belongings and keep an open mind. It seems as though you are definitely handling this well.

I second Dennis's assertion that your taste in music, movies and memorabilia will not cause an infestation of negative entities. Granted, I went through a jag of watching every paranormal show (not the ghost hunter variety) that I could track down and when I wasn't watching, I was reading such accounts. And when I couldn't find any such content, I was watching Law and Order SVU. I did notice that the atmosphere in my home grew a bit weird, there was an uptick in activity and I was always on alert. However, I firmly believe that sort of effect is caused more by the energy such an overwhelming volume of gloomy to downright violent programming evoked in me rather than any energy it carried on its own. And, to be fair, I was consuming a ridiculously large amount of this stuff practically round the clock.

In the same way that I believe my OD'ing on the aforesaid programming effected my emotional state, which in turn effected the energies and subsequently entities in my home - I think H's stress levels could be having a similar effect in your home. It may not be your home that is haunted but him - the negative energy he is putting off could be attracting a curious (or other) entity to him. It could even be that it is your brother checking on him on your behalf.

Let us know how things have gone with the cleansing 🖤

Nightbreed ~ The loss of a sibling is very hard, you never really get over it.

Please let us know how this turns out. Wishing you the very best

Nightbreed:

First, my condolences on the loss of your brother. Family can be a difficult topic at the best of times, so thank you for being clear about that relationship as a factor in your response.

It appears to me that you're taking the best parts of the advice given by each of us. I do hope that this brings about positive growth and openness between you and H. It can be frightening to open up to another person when trying to explain how having paranormal abilities of some kind has affected your life or why it is proving difficult in the present. Taking H seriously on this point will build great trust.

A tip of my hat to you.

Best,
Biblio.

First of all, I want to thank you guys for the advice you've presented me. My goal is always to try and understand/work with others, not judge them or prove anything, so I do try to be as open-minded as is possible.

Cuddlebear- I think the way you described your relationship with your wife probably comes closest to my relationship with H. I want very much to preserve our relationship, and I'd have no problem with carrying out a cleansing.

Dennis191- Let me just compliment you on your taste in music, first of all. But you also made me consider a few reasons why H might be specifically uncomfortable with my music collection.

Bibliothecarius- I was worried that H was trying to manipulate our shared space too at first. Since I submitted my story, H and I have talked about the specifics of what freaks him out. H's mom and mine are friends, and before we were introduced, H met my big brother, who he always felt uneasy around. My brother was a troubled man who could be unpredictable and toxic at times. He died last April of a drug overdose. So he was still alive before H moved in. At the time I wasn't speaking to my brother, because he had become too chaotic of an element in my life.

It wasn't always this way; as a teenager I spent a lot of time with my brother, who introduced me to a lot of the music I love, and a lot of my favorite movies. He loved Metallica, Motorhead, Mercyful Fate, and most of all Iron Maiden. Number of the Beast was his favorite album. It's mine now, and I suppose I feel connected to him through that. I also have two of his favorite movie posters, Scarface and The Shining prominently displayed. It's my way of remembering the good times, and honoring his memory.

H confessed to me that it is these three items that frighten him, because he believes my brother's spirit is attached to them. He worries that the shadow person he's seen is my brother, and like I mentioned, my brother made him uneasy in life. H is concerned that my brother is a negative presence, because of the way things ended. H has indicated that he would feel better if I did perform a cleansing ritual. So thank you for informing me about Rook's ritual, I plan to try it.

While I doubt that my brother's spirit is actually here (if there is an afterlife, I like to think he's moved on from his corporeal troubles), maybe it would be cathartic to cleanse the apartment, to just say "I know you tried, and I forgive you. And you don't have to worry, H is a good man." to my brother. It won't hurt me to do this, and H seems to think it could help take care of whatever is happening. I'm just hopeful that it will make H feel more secure living here. I'll update you all about how this goes.

Greetings, nightbreed, and welcome to YGS.

I'm glad that your skepticism is right out in front of your narrative, yet you chose to ask us to help you work out H's issue.

When I was younger, I desperately wanted someone to convince me that the supernatural didn't exist and that my intuitions, visions, precognitions, postcognitions, and ghost experiences were all imaginary. I prefer the certainty of facts, data, documentation, and logic, but I've adapted to paranormal events and the peculiar abilities that continue to be part of my life.

If, for example, I were to feel uneasy in a location, I'd rule out sensible options first. Some spooky, uncomfortable feelings can be dealt with by purchasing a dehumidifier; sinister scraping sounds may be caused by squirrels invading the attic. When an event that is not attributable to commonplace causes, it *still* can be narrowed down (with some accuracy) to general causes...

If everything was fine until --for example-- you purchased a dybbuk box on eBay, then everything went 'Poltergeist' (1982) in your home, you'd have a good reason to see if the situation improves when you remove the dybbuk box. For H to assert that *all* of the memorabilia, albums, and movies you have collected are the cause of his issue with the shadow entity is a sweeping accusation without foundation. That's akin to knowing that you can get a dvd of 'Poltergeist' from Barnes & Noble, so you're going to solve your problem by committing felony arson at that bookstore.

H knew your collection existed before he moved in. He did not have a problem when he was sleeping in the apartment intermittently; it is now that he resides in the apartment that someone/something has become more interested in him. *Whatever* it is that he has seen may not be harmful or evil in any way; it may just be curious! One of my high school teachers lived in a haunted house; because he was old and couldn't negotiate the staircase easily, he had rooms on the 2nd floor that he did not use. Every year, some "problem child" would get kicked out of his or her home, and "Mr. Mac" would let them move into one of his upstairs rooms without cost until they got themselves sorted out. Many of these students saw the Civil War soldier if they moved in for longer than a week because it wanted to know who the student was. Mr. Mac only glimpsed it once, in his late-sixties or early-seventies, despite having been born & raised in that house. Human spirits are still very human; curiosity is a normal mindset. Just because it has a shadowy appearance, it doesn't mean it was inherently evil.

If H had a straightforward accusation to level at a *specific* piece of memorabilia (e.g.: "I feel like your autographed 18-inch "Pinhead" figurine is watching me"), that would be a point to negotiate. Stating that *all* of your stuff has to go is not a reasonable reaction to his issue; it sounds more like emotional blackmail and a passive-aggressive effort to establish control over your shared environment.

My wife trusts my abilities & intuitions (which is surprisingly reassuring), but she's only ever watched 'The Exorcist' and 'The Exorcism of Emily Rose' with me. She doesn't care for horror films in general, but both of these films depict the Catholic church (to which she belongs) in a positive manner. She had no ill effects from watching them; she suffered no crisis of faith nor paranoid delusions; she watched them & discussed them with me. Basically, I had to promise that *if* I thought something remotely like either of these movie plots was happening in our lives, I'd tell her *immediately.*

My only request of my wife was that we not display her small collection of porcelain dolls in a prominent location because dolls have always creeped me out. I'm aware that's childish, but we all have hangups that deserve respect and accommodation.

Do not throw out your stuff; instead, use Rook's cleansing to alleviate H's stress. This cleansing leaves room for positive spirits to remain while banishing those of negative intent. I've copied his ritual from his homepage, and I'm including it as the post-script to this somewhat rambling post.

Best,
Biblio.

Rook's Cleansing and Shielding Method
(https://www.yourghoststories.com/user-profile.php?user=8155)

Recipe for a Home Cleansing/Shielding... (allow for two or 3 days to complete)

Day one: Open all curtains window and doors with screens installed, let fresh air and sunshine into the home. Have all closets, cabinets and other 'dark spaces' open so that as much natural light as possible can enter those spaces. After 2-3 hours take a broom and 'sweep' out each room (this is symbolic and you do not have to really sweep) focus your thoughts on sweeping (pushing) out all negative energies / entities /thoughts. Close home up after completing each room of your home... Please do not forget your garage if you have one. (Optional) Light incense (sandalwood or Dragons-blood works well for me) and let aroma fill the home, and/or play a tape that contains your favorite Church/Positive, Upbeat (songs that give you good thoughts) songs before you begin sweeping.

Day two (or three): Once again open all curtains, windows and doors. Take a White candle (Optional) to the center most point of the home, sit on the floor and place candle in front of you. Light the candle (visualize a white ball of light) and then focus on the flame... Visualize the flame (white light) filled with positive thoughts, energy. (Say a prayer at this time if you so desire... Ask for cleansing positive energy to fill the candles flame/white light). Hold this 'image' in your mind and then visualize the flame (light) slowly expanding outward, visualize it filling the room your in, every corner and 'dark space'. Continue to visualize it expanding...it's outer edges pushing away (burning away) any and all negative energies/entities out and away from each room in your home. Once you have visualized this flame (light) filling your entire home, picture it expanding to your property lines. Hold this image in your mind for a few moments then visualize 'anchoring' this flame (light) where you are sitting which is the center most point of your home. Once you have done this. Take a deep breath, relax a few moments and then blow out the candle. (If you didn't use a candle just let yourself relax a moment or two.) "

Now you can create a shield for yourself using the 'home shield' technique but instead of focusing on your home visualize the 'flame' simply surrounding you instead of your home... Best time to do this is after a nice shower using a rosemary scented soap (rosemary is good for purification and protection.)

Edit: I know what I've said about the music for fact because I do listen to WELL over 50 bands ranging from pink Floyd to Mayhem and everything in between, and also play a lot of the music I listen to... So yeah, 'tallica, maiden, priest, dio, sabbath, saxon, mayhem, Kreator, gnr, acdc, Green day, sex pistols, mötley crüe, skidrow, Billy idol, sabaton, children of bodom, angel dust, rhapsody of fire, nightwish, helloween, offspring, pink Floyd, deep purple, nirvana, sound garden, megadeth, tyrant, warrant, overkill, rotting christ, Slayer, cannibal corpse, Rob zombie, tdwp, White snake, manson, Ruthless, Ossian, Pokolgép, tankcsapda, burning witches, morbid angel, five finger death punch, manowar, kárpátia, zztop, twisted sister, quiet riot, David Lee Roth, van Hallen, fear factory, korn, Devildriver, blind guardian, blind saviour, heavylution, sanctuary, stratovarious, Death, grim reaper, pantera, lordi, disturbed, avenged sevenfold, motörhead, lamb of God, burzum, behemoth, amon amaranth, and probably a hundred more, point being I've been listening to all sorts of rock and metal since the age of 11, and no demon came to claim my soul yet, I've even smoked weed a few times, did all the teenager things, had fun with boys and girls, and just really lived life in general... Every aspect of it. And point being I don't see how that could invite things like that. It's all there in the world, for the reason that it was all invented and made or discovered for mankind. As it shows from the list I've been actively listening to everything from classic Rock through hard Rock power and speed and heavy metal to black and death and thrash and nu and metalcore and only god knows what I haven't, attended 24 live shows, so... I am not seeing any music bringing closer evil things from beyond 🤗

I stopped reading when movies and music was mentioned as a possible cause *eye roll* if any sort of music would be favored by evil forces, then it's the modern rap and such for they have nothing to say and so make the listener dumb since all they say is you need sex and drugs *eye roll* but even that couldn't be proven to be more or less attractive to evil forces, but I figured that'd be the best bet, since most real metal songs have meaning and something to say. That all being said to enlighten anyone still caught up in the urban myth that metal is satanic, now let's move onto the movies...
I've never even heard of a single real case where something started as a result of watching a movie or having signed posters, and even if this was the case with you, then the dark figure wouldn't target your boy but you, and since it doesn't make Any sense otherwise, please stop making real music and musicians look bad, as they are in no way responsible for whatever you're experiencing.

Now to dealing with evil things, I've read a few comments mentioning a member called Rook, he's got a cleansing ritual detailed on his "about me" sect. Seems to make sense. Best of luck to you

Nightbreed ~ Welcome to the site!

I empathize with you. My wife is a devout believer, I consider myself a sceptic with an open mind. I have seen and experienced things I can neither explain nor understand but I remain hesitant about assigning these experiences to the realm of the "Supernatural".

That said I do have a couple of suggestions for you. "Reasoning" with H will not work; you two have vastly different reference points so what you find "reasonable" he will not and vice versa. So I urge you to proceed as if H is correct. That leaves you with three alternatives:

1). End the relationship.

2). Divest yourself of your memorabilia.

3). Cleanse your apartment and your memorabilia.

Under the assumption that the first two alternatives are not viable go with the last. Cleansing, as used here, means to perform certain rituals to remove bad energy from people, places, or things. Whether you believe in this or not it is entirely probable that H does. Whether this cleansing actually does something or just seems to do something doesn't really matter as long it provides the results that you desire, that is that H notices a change. Now as to the type of cleansing you have several options but consider first how religious H is. If H is very religious you may want to bring in the appropriate clergy person to perform the ritual. On the other hand, if H is more on the spiritual side there are several cleansing rituals you can find on this site; hopefully some of the other posters can you lead you to them.

Should the cleansing not work, then you will need to address either of the first two alternatives and I hope it does not come to that. Though my wife and I differ on so many things our lives have been enriched by being together these thirty years. Granted some compromises have been made by both of us.

I wish you and H the best of luck with this problem. I also urge you to keep an open mind... There are more things in heaven and Earth Nightbreed, than are dreamt of in your philosophy...