Maybe I Should Run

English is not my first language so if you don't understand something, just ask.

I'm 20 year old female from Finland. I've been experiencing strange stuff for some years now. Here's some background information: All things (except one) I'm about to tell have happened in our house & its surroundings. I still live with my family (me, mum & dad and his dog).

So, when I was about 14-15, I heard loud scratching at night. It was coming from near the kitchen window. I just thought it was some kind of animal... But once I visited my aunt I heard the same noise! And now it was louder and more desperate. My aunt's home was two-storey and I was sleeping in the second floor. And the strange scratching noise was coming beneath my room's only window. I first thought my aunt's dogs were just messing around, but the noise didn't come from downstairs.

The second strange thing happened when I was 16. It was year 2007. I decided for some weird reason to go to our backyard in the middle of the night. So I went. It was, if I remember correctly, mid-November and there was little amount of snow in the ground. I walked in the middle of our backyard and then I heard footsteps coming towards me. I saw no one. I just heard the noise when someone walks on snow. It was super creepy and I ran back inside.

And it was last year when I and my dad's dog heard noise from outside. It sounded like someone came with bicycle towards our front door. After that we heard talking, but I couldn't hear exact words.

But the strangest thing is still happening and it sounds waaaaaay crazier than those I already wrote. It began in 2008 when I had oddly empathic thoughts about someone who killed himself (I can't tell his name here because someone could recognize me). I don't know how this is possible, but then he came to me. It hard to explain how it happened, but suddenly I could "see" him with my mind's eye. Let's call him H. Back then I didn't pay lots of attention to him because I was more interested in school and friends. But then things started to go messy. I became depressed because I was thinking too much about things that weren't too healthy... My school didn't go so well because I had problems in one subject. I had suicidal thoughts and I'm glad I had then my friends with me. Most of my second year in the upper secondary school was infected by my depressive state of mind. Then in summer 2009 I started to think positively, and when I started my third year in my school I was happier.

And then this "thing" with H escalated. Autumn 2009 was very odd for me. I was so happy, I don't even know why exactly, and then he just became closer to me. I talked to him and began to really like him. Then I felt like someone was with me in my room. I felt like someone was touching my back when I was surfing in the net with my laptop. My room also became a lot colder. It has always been cold, but now I really noticed it. Sometimes I felt cold breeze on my arms like it was winding in my room. And sometimes I felt someone touching me in my sleep but this was/is pretty rare. One morning I was woken up by my cell phone and I shut it down. I closed my eyes and I was half asleep when I heard loud bangs. I woke up and went to do my morning things. This happened twice actually, but at the second time I heard like someone has clapped their hands loudly. Those could be dreams, but I have never woken up like that. I don't know if H is doing all these things or not. I have asked several times but it's kind of hard to talk with him because he never uses words. It's more like telepathy. He seems pretty positive about doing those things, so maybe it's him. I can't figure out who else it could be.

I've had dreams about him (I know the rule about dreams but I think this is important) and in one dream he was playing piano. Yeah, sounds pretty normal but then after that dream I read that he really played piano when he was alive! Strange...

And when I asked him when my father comes home (I don't like my dad so much) and H said that he will come home on Wednesday. And my dad did came back home that day!

H has never done anything scary and he has never harmed me in any way. At least not yet... Hehe. But he has acted strangely when I thought that I should get rid of him. And one time when I thought getting rid of him, I became very exhausted. I found myself staring at the wall, thinking nothing. It was really odd. And when I met a guy from Internet, H started acting cold. He is now pretty normal but he still glares at me when I check my e-mail to see if the guy I met has answered. It really didn't work out between us (I mean me & the guy from Internet) but it's not important. H has admitted he's very lonely where he is now.

And I don't know if this is relevant, but I had one really scary sleep paralysis experience in March. I was sleeping (of course) and suddenly I felt someone pinning my hands down and I couldn't scream. I struggled and thought about Jesus and it stopped. I even don't believe in God. That was scary. I never had any sleep paralysis experiences until I "met" H. Once I woke up and I saw someone's face near my own. I didn't freak out, I just turned my back to it and continued sleeping.

I know how crazy this all sounds. I've never been diagnosed with mental illness. I can manage with my life, I have still my friends (real-life friends) and I'm still in contact with them. I have plans for my future, and generally I'm feeling good.

So I'm asking: is this thing with H something dangerous? What exactly is he? Is he just result of my overactive imagination or what? And should I get rid of him?