I come from a very close knit family, we did everything together. I was a self-proclaimed Daddy's girl and often called on my Dad for help. Life as I knew it changed in 2003 when my Dad passed away. To say I was heartbroken would be an understatement. Although I had already reached adulthood, I felt like I needed my Dad for so many ordinary things.
In 2007, I became pregnant for the first time. Even though I was beyond excited, part of me was sad that my Dad would never know this child. At 13 weeks, there were complications and I went to the hospital. Sadly, I miscarried and once again I was devastated.
As the medical staff performed routine exams, I began to feel lightheaded. I went to stand up, but instead I fell to the floor. I was out cold. As I lay there unconscious on the hospital floor, I realize that my Dad is there! He never said a word but I felt overwhelmed with love and I felt the sensation of being hugged, not physically but emotionally perhaps. I cannot fully express in words the feeling I felt but I didn't want it to end. It was pure joy. As I began to come to, I heard the voices of several nurses calling out to me trying to wake me. I was annoyed by their efforts, so much so that I actually told them to just leave me there. I didn't want it to end. My Dad was there like always in my time of need. I'd also like to think that he was there to accompany his grandchild that I was worried he'd never meet.
Several years and 3 amazing children later, I was up alone doing laundry. I clearly heard a little boy's voice right next to me say "Mom?" It was said like a question, like Mom, is that you? This was not any of my children's voices. It was an older child. It was so clear that I immediately went to check on them thinking maybe someone was in the house but of course; they were fine and fast asleep. Then I remembered that the morning before I was up making breakfast, when I heard little footsteps upstairs. I was expecting my crew to toddle down, but after a couple of minutes I went to check on them. Again, they were all sound asleep. My husband has told me that when he's home alone, he has heard a child running upstairs. Thinking that I somehow left one of the kids, he'll go to investigate only to find no one.
These instances are a sweet reminder that although we may have lost loved ones, they never truly leave us.
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