Is it possible that some people have an influence on their environment? Although most of my brushes with the paranormal made me assume that it was a separate entity that was haunting me, I've recently reconsidered this.
To elaborate, one major event completely flipped my perception. One night, my boyfriend and I weren't getting along. I was even considering breaking it off with him because he was being really insensitive. I wanted him to understand me and to be able to know what I was thinking. I then went off to the bathroom to wash my face and just cool off. I lay down on the twin bed on the other side of the room since I didn't want to sleep by him. My brain was on overdrive from the stress and I was imagining countless scenarios and conversations. I began hearing him mutter "shut up, shut up" so I began getting confused but I ignored it. He then started saying it louder and louder. I was beginning to worry so I got up and asked him why he was saying that but he seemed not to hear me. I turned on the light and saw him curled up in the corner, hands over his ears. I walked over and sat right next to him asking what was wrong when he started yelling and begging for "it to stop." I started to panic. I pried his hands off his ears and wished and prayed that whatever was hurting him would stop. He then started to calm down. After a while of having his head in my lap, he had completely calmed down so I asked him what happened.
He asked me why I wouldn't stop talking earlier. I was utterly confused. All I could say was, "what?" He then proceeded to tell me that when I left for the bathroom, I was muttering something and the rest of the time when I was in the room, I wouldn't stop talking. He told me that he wanted to pull his ears off because it got so loud.
This was when it dawned on me that before I left for the bathroom, I expressly wished for him to know what I was thinking. At first, I rejected the idea that I was responsible because it seemed ridiculous. After a while of thinking about it more, it started to make sense. My boyfriend had said I was "muttering" when I was in the bathroom and "talking" when I was in the room and "unbearably loud" when I was right above him. I then started to think about my past experiences. I used to hear footsteps around my bed at night when I was younger so I thought these experiences can't be my fault but then I remembered being afraid of the dark since my mother would make me watch countless scary movies with her and how when I was extremely frightened, I wanted my parents to walk into the room to check on me. After that, I remember how I sort of wanted things to keep on happening because nobody believed me and I didn't want to believe that I was crazy and how when these things happened, it was during times when I was extremely paranoid. I began to rethink everything that happened to me from the time the light in the bathroom turned off on me when I saw a spider from the time that I was taking a shower and needed conditioner when the conditioner fell onto the shower floor behind me.
As I thought about it more and more, I began connecting events to what I was thinking/feeling/needing at the time. For example: when the light turned off on me, I remember thinking that I didn't want to see this spider (I have arachnophobia). I've tried to do things "on purpose" but I never can. Is it even possible for someone to have this ability? It fascinates me but terrifies me at the same time. I'm even considering asking a professional for answers but I'm kind of worried that I'll end up as a sort of "science experiment."
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