Tired Sorrow

Over the past few weeks I have been finding it very difficult to get a good nights sleep, there is no paticular reason for this at all, I'm not stressed or under any pressure at work, infact I'd have to say this is one of the happier times in my life as my girlfriend and I are expecting twins in 2 months time. All the sleepless nights eventually took their toll and I decided to take a week off work for a bit of rest and recuperation.

First couple of days of my week off were spent doing things around the house and when the mrs would allow it, playing computer games. So that takes us up until Wednesday and the day of my 'experience'. My girlfriend had gone to a friends for lunch and a chit chat so I was left at home to watch some movies I'd recorded the previous day. After I'd watched the first movie I decided to read the daily paper. So there I was reading the paper, laying on the sofa, when the dvd player came back on all on its own. This had happened before on 4-5 occasions over the past month or so but I'd always reasoned that I must be next door's remote setting off my player. But still, every time it happens it gives me the creeps. Around 20 minutes later at 2pm I had the most terrifying experience of my life.

I was still reading the paper when I heard what I can best describe as a low rumble of thunder coming from inside the room I was in and immediately as the sound began I felt pressure been applied to my ankle. This lasted for around 3-4 seconds during which time I was pulled 2 feet down the sofa by the pressure on my ankle. As soon as it all began it had stopped. I say that, but there seemed to be a pressence with me. Not a person/spirit but what I can only describe as sorrow. I felt such a deep chill of sadness it brought tears to my eyes and for a moment I forgot about having been scared out of my wits. That feeling I experienced could possibly be explained as fear but if felt more than that. That feeling was broken by a sound from outside, a passing car I believe, after which I began to try and make sense of what had happened.

Ive tried and tried to find a rational explanation for all this, I asked myself if I was so tired could I have imagined the whole thing but then I look at the mark left on my ankle and I know I didn't. The mark isn't in the shape of a hand but just a random bruise, one that you might get if you twisted your ankle but it doesn't feel bruised or hurt in any way at all.

I dare not tell my girlfriend about this as its not been the easiest of pregnancies and she had experiences of an unexplained nature as a teenager, which to this day she will not talk about in any great detail as it scares her. I always thought things like this just don't happen and that people who say they have had experiances were making it up or it was their mind playing tricks on them. I myself have always been mentaly strong so I know it wasn't that.

I'm at a loss as to what to do now, I'm not religious but the only thing I could think of was to arrange to speak to my company chaplain. I'm meeting up with him tomorrow and I'm hoping he can help me make sense of what happened. It's been four years since I left the army but I have remained close to a lot of the guys who are still in, him being one of them. I have perhaps stereo-typed my experiance by doing this but like I said, it's all I could think of on top of posting on this site and maybe hoping someone else has had a similar experience.

On a final note, and I find this realy odd, it's now the following Monday and since the day it happened and I have had nights of the best sleep I have had in weeks, at the time it scared me but now I just want answers, its the not knowing what's driving me mad and I guess that's why I'm posting on here also.

Regards DJ